Good Bye 2009 and Welcome 2010

Welcoming 2010 is a good start for every1...
What is your new year resolution... think it carefully before cause all things gonna start from today...

2009 is not a very good year for me, i think many trials and tribulations, many circumstances.. i have not overcome it yet.. what else besides that... my 2009 new year resolutions does not occur, i want to upgrade my patience level but then is still the same, until a limit i explode again... argghhh... that's why so many things happen.. many problems i faced.. i've tried to neutralize the problems but then it cant....

This year my new year resolution .. i hope that it all goes well and all beyond my expectations...

Happy New Year Every1...!! Stay Pretty and Stay Handsome alwayss...
Take Care -n- God Bless....=)

Generation today...

I just read an article and this is really amazing and it is true, what happen to the world today?

Suicide is a worldwide issue, and in Asian region it takes place in rank top number 2, in a form of death among the Asian's young and old. And we can see situation, circumstances, people surrounding us they are just normal human being just like me and you need to face many things. And many of them wants/likes to follow the 'out shining' ones, but do they think before who they are actually, they are the same as us normal human beings, why not we follow the person who have greater impact and will change our lives become better and gives us a better future. The person who shows love, peace and joy to everything they do instead of the person who influence you become another person which is the negative ones.For example: The smart students always influence the person besides them to be more hardworking, and will help their friends who need help instead of a student who likes to boast and show off infront their friends with what they have or another type of people, when they need u they find u, when they don need u or they have found someone better they kick u a side.....

The example below is from a part of the articles,

For example, in 2008 there were a series of celebrity suicides in South Korea between October and December that led to many “copy cat” suicides from the fans of the celebrities who chose to take their lives as well. This kind of suicide effect does not just happen in Korea, but similar cases all over Asia. It is not a surprise that when a celebrity commits suicide, that the young fans will do the same, because celebrities have influence on the youth. What is the cause? Personally, I believe there are three main root issues that many celebrities and young people have to deal with…

1. Performance ~ in Asian culture there is a high premium put on our performance. If we do not perform well, we will be judged and rejected. This is true for celebrities especially who are always being seen in the limelight. A celebrities every action and move is being watched and if they fail, they are judged harshly. This is also true for young people who feel they have to perform well for their parents in school, or for others in society to accept them. The underlying issue, people are not loved outside of their performance and their identity is equated to how well they can perform in life. Outside of their performance they are worth nothing.
2. Pressure ~ in Asian culture there is also great pressure to meet the expectations of others. People constantly give us pressure to do more, to be a certain way or be something we are not. We are given pressure to look a certain way, act a certain way, we are compared to others and when we don’t measure up to the pressure, we break down into bouts of discouragement, depression, feelings of shame and even suicide. Celebrities and youth deal with societal pressure, peer pressure all the time.
3. Pain ~ in Asian culture it is not okay to tell people how you really feel at times. We hid our feelings, instead of expressing them to others to find comfort and solace. When we don’t feel understood, listened to, or cared for pain begins to be felt in our hearts and slowly destroys us on the inside. We begin to feel that people only love us for our performance, for what we can produce, for what we can do but not for who we are. (This is especially true for celebrities who are so loved and celebrated on the stage, but may feel so lonely and misunderstood in real life.) We become afraid of what other people think, because we don’t want to show weakness, so we hide our pain, keep it to ourselves until one day we cannot bear with the pain anymore… suicide then becomes an option.

I urge us as a society and people to give more grace to those who face these struggles with performance, pressure and pain. We especially need to give grace, mercy and forgiveness to those people in the limelight. Whether they are celebrities, government leaders or young people who are battling with depression and shame, all people deserve to be loved for who they are, not how perfect they can be.

11/12

Many youths and young adults now a days take relationship as a game, some even boast to their friends, some even flirting one another....

I heard a news from 1 of my friend said tat her friend who was married and have kids and she still can flirting around with guys without tell them she already married. She even asked her friend to keep secret that dont tell any1 she was married.

Another 1 more, she was married with 2 kids. Within 2 years she divorced... She left her 2 kids to her husband...

And now, 1 of my friend keep on boast in front of us, i dunno y, is just a guy like her and started sms her.. than i dunno why she like to boast in front of us lo and keep on lcly... and she boast in front of 1 of her close friend... purposely act that the guy very annoying this and that... make her cant sleep laa... don feel like wan layan the guy la this la that la... and say her friend u gt no ppl want to find u la... this la that la.. what laa all this.. what so nice to boast of actually...

Can a marriage reborn?
Can a promise kept?
How to discover an enduring love?

There is always an answer... but then how do people find it??

Keeping a marriage commitment is not easy in today's world. Statistics say that 50% of marriages end in divorce.

Good marriages don't automatically happen - they are intentionally built.

23/11

Suddenly i feel like hugging u... i dunno why??
u just have the ability to make my heart fall into u...
my heart now has a very weird feeling, i hope u also the same... would u miss me? thinking of me?

Nothing gonna change my love for you ^^

I liked this song very much, sang by 方大同！！这首歌好感动。。。^^
There is an english version, but I like the version sang by the chinese .. hehehhe...



If I had to live without you near me
The days would all be empty
The nights would seem so long,
With you I see forever oh, so clearly
I might have been in love before
But it never felt this strong

Our dreams are young and we both know
They'll take us where we want to go
Hold me now, touch me now
I don't want to live wihout you

Chorus 1
Nothing gonna change my love for you
You ought know by how much I love you
One thing you can be sure of
I'll never ask for more than your love.

Chorus 2
Nothing gonna change my love for you
You ought to know by now how much I love you
The world may change to my life through buy nothings gonna change my love for you

If the road ahead is not so easy
Our love will lead the way for us like a guiding star
I'll be there for you if you should need me
You don't have to change a thing
I love you just the way you are

So come with me and share this view
I'll help you see forever too
Hold me now, touch me now
I don't want to live without you.

21/11

Now i only and dream and wait.. would it happen??
Or is my own feeling only.. i dunno what's going on...
Everything is changing when i turn around...
Ouch.... is painful,
i thought that situation will happen on me, but then it changes..
Change to a different direction....
At this moment, i hope to get a shoulder to lean on...

很想有个肩膀依靠........ can I..???

19/11

Time flies... end of da year d... new year is coming soon. Sometimes i wonder.. is new year good, or da world gonna end soon. Since i was a little girl, i loves celebrating CNY alwayss..coz is fun, gathered with all my cousies, shopping, new clothes, house warming, woww.. is fun and amazing, but now age is getting older. I still like celebrating CNY coz can buy new clothes and enjoy my shopping spree... hooray... But now, the feeling would not be like last time, because worried of the end of the world...ok... don think of it anymore.. everytime when dis concept or statement came to my mind, it makes me uncomfortable and nightmares... arrgghhh...

This sem, very free, free until always stay at home ' measure road' ohh.. shit mann.. i cant stand this type of life.. too free...hahhahaaa....
This end of the year, the weather in Malaysia is cold, no matter in KL or Malacca... wow... i love the cooling weather mann.. is amazingg... hehehhehee=p And my friend in Melbourne started complain the weather is Melbourne is damm hot, coz Malaysia has stolen their cold weather.. wat nonsence is this la wei... hahhahaa.. bt den damm funny aa...
hahhaaaa...

Ok.. we gonna spend our time in our last sem, and every1 gonna choose their path to their future.. hahahhaa. But then i hope tat everyone will continue pursue their studies for a better future.. hehhee... ^^ hope to be with u all nx year again.. hhahahaa=p

12/11

Supposingly i have to study now, bt den... hahah blogging, fb-ing, chatting. hahahaha
now flu, fever make ,me no mood to study...
i wonder how m i goin 2 sit for my examm tmr... plzz help me to concentrate... thankss... Amen!! =)

it makes me sad =(

Today, me and a few friends went to the marketing department to ask about the UOS degree thingy. And i've made my decision to study at UOS. Then i told my dad bout my decision and he said what.?? That time segi told us at the beginning that our degree just nid to add about 10kplus only but now degree is 32k extra and if u take the segi degree is 34k. what is that going on o. Segi o the price is higher than UOS.

Then my ptptn loan is we need to borrow from government around 50k. No income now but already owe government around 16k den now le another 30k... haizz...
I told my dad he was like... huh..?? he voice actually ok geh bt den he changed wat?? den how bout my sis gonna study in uni soon, later on my brother... how if my sis did not get her scholarship?? den why not go mmu study since i continue it in m'sia d... MMU... i don wan... u noe i don like mmu all this while....seriously i don like mmu. i don wan mmu. Not to say what la, i understand my dad feeling also suddenly need alot of money, and compare between me, my sis and my bro of course they are smarter than me and their result of course better than me alot... bt den i don wanna stop now... seriously i don wan...

After the degree thingy now, my house, where m i suppose to stay now o..?? our hse contract gonna end on the january 2010. but now like everything also not confirm not confirm.. what m i suppose to do...

I just want my degree cert and I just want to find a house to stay with a good environment... but where and when can i get the answer asap??? i don wanna cried bout dis anymore... my age cant wait anymore... plz.. i beg u!!!

last october and welcoming the new november =)

Last saturday which is 31 october. It was halloween day.. we went out for dinner at tesco den we spent our time in Laundry The Curve. there were 7 of us there.. da place was full and we ordered 2 buckets of beer.. ermm.. wow... every1 drank quiet alot tat day... hahahaa

We saw ppl dressing up wifth their custom.. oo... they are brave enough although we are not in the US .. hahhaaa...

Novermber starts, we need to really plan our future now.. seriously because, we still dunno our direction, actually everything was well planned bt den da college ruined it all.. they nv consider of their outstation students like us. we need to find home, rent room.

And now, uad all nid 2 go kl. wat..?/ kl..?? i hate tat place.. got transport nvm.. bt den nid 2 take bus all.. how bout raining times... my parents would not like me go to kl... i hate changing situation all the times...

Currently, about uos some said feb cant take loan, some say can..which 1 is da real answer. y cant take loan, government always increase the higher education loan in the 2010 budget, to achieve this objectives government will consider relaxing rules and regulations, this will reduce the IPTA to reduce their financial dependance on government. why government uni students loan are more than us the private college students??

If seriously uos cant take loan, wat shud i do now..?? go kl study uad..?? ohh.. no.. i don wan kl .. plzz...... my frenz still can wait coz they are still young bt me... my age... when i graduate.. all things not gonna be da same....

16 and 17 sept 2009

Erm.. this is so called ' the GBS meeting up' coz it was kenny and ah fatt's birthday... hahaa.. supposing we must reach there by 9pm bt den cozz to many people from different parts of selangor and kl so we were late... we reach ampang look up point at 11pm pheww...

Besides that, not only malaccan, there is also 3 of them from ipoh, which is chanel, jessie and ziqin, hahaa... unbelievable, chanel and ziqin was primary school mates and did not meet up for the very long time and finally both of dem met up here... hahaha... what a wonderful gathering not only for us bt for them oso... wakkakaa. Although everyone of us are from GBS Malacca bt den we are glad to know them 3, they are funny and we chat alot.. hahhaa... mayb all of us are malacca and juz 3 of them are ipoh so they don dare 2 share to much things cozzz scared we 'whack' dem wakakkaa... jkjk....

Not only that, weeyong bcome more n more bulat, as usual as evry1 said, n den surprisingly eugene hair turn gold.. haha... his reason is, he fell into a big drain n turn gold.. wat a lame joke..wakakka.. on this day, eugene and meiyit will be having presentation tmr, bt their slide not done yet.. dey damm stress mann hahaha.... there are many lame jokes coming out on tat day... hahahaa.... we enjoy our nite in the cooling weather .... =p

Rakuzen

We enjoy our nite at Rakuzen Desa Park City, this is a small gathering 4 us and it also celebrating mei yit's bday... wakakka.. Ah fatt, Edvin, Mei Yit, Mei Yin and me were enjoying our dinner.. although abit expensive bt den we enjoy our gathering time... wakkaa.. cant believe after 2 yrs of studying in kl we can meet each other n yamcha in kl as usual as what we always go in malacca.. wakakaa.... =p





my confidante



that's us with our delicious food


Yin, Yi , Yit

speechless... ~~

I read this article from 1 of my friend's blog, this is the problem that many people might facing now. It seriously happen surround us, some can feel it, and some cant, it depends on a person sensibility. This is just apart of the article and I edited some of it.

I cannot understand how the mechanisms of some people’s brain work sometimes. How can they be so extremely fake? I always said I hated backstabbers. I hate the jab from the back. But this is totally different from what I’ve seen so far. So totally different.

This individual can laugh. This individual can smile. This individual knows how to get angry, and he/she definitely knows how to condemn. If you’d wronged him/her, then get ready for his/her judgment. He/She’ll ignore, he/she’ll condemn you behind your back, and deny it in front you with almost genuine anger. He/She hates to be questioned, no matter how questionable his/her actions might be. This individual sees faults in others. Did he/ she seen any error in his/herself.

He/She’d treated me nice before. But the more I think about it makes me wonder if his/her warmth is genuine at all. All he/ she need was company. All he/she need was someone to talk to, no matter who it is. No matter how much he/she actually hates you. All he/she need is to own the world. He/She needs to make the world bow to his/her command. He/She wants the world to know how he/ she felt. But he/she never bothers to care what the world’s feeling. A self centered individual.

Genting...

Marilah kita bersama - sama menyaksikan gambar-gambar yang telah ambil oled professional-professional sekalian...

Gambar ini telah menunjukkan titik nostalgia yang dikenangi ...^^
Enjoy da Show...!!

Enjoy our genting trip... hooray... juzz although juz 2days 1night bt den is fun... love the cool weather dere... so happy dat da weather is cool...i'm loving it... wakakkaaa

Sadnya, i miss all my roller coaster... =( wuwuwu... beratur lama.. tetapi sudah mau sampai kita punya turn dah hujan dahh.... aiduhhai.... betul-betul menyedihkan.

we went to the casino too.. haha... although nt playing bt den nampak banyak 'gamble hantu' kat sana.... amat tidak dapat menyangkakan... mereka sanggup membazirkan wang mereka dengan banyak dan langsung tidak peduli mereka akan menang atau tidak...

walaubagaimanapun, trip kami sangat syok tetapi.. saya juga ada sedih.. fren saya cakap tak payah peduli.. tetapi.. saya tau saya boleh ignore.. tapi macam mana ignore... jika saya cakap banyak, takut orang cakap saya backstab tak cakap,tak paham isi hati saya tengah fikir... saya benar-benar ada jemput, saya memang tak paham kenapa cakap saya tak jemput. Ada apa yang tak paham teruslah tanya saya directly.... tak payah cakap byk byk... kadangkala memang tak paham akan mechanism otak fikir...adakah sesetangah pompuan bersifaat begini..??? kita hanyalah insan biasa tapi byk perkara dan isu masih tidak dapat memahami... kadangkala ku rasa, ku sebagai seorang pompuan tapi masih tak dapat faham apa seorang pompuan fikir, adakah perbezaannya antara sifat pompuan atau terdapat pelbagai jenis pompuan di dunia ini?? ini adalah pompuan juga tak paham pompuan bukan lelaki yang complain saja, pompuan juga... wakakkaa...

Harap memaafkan jika saya ada buat apa apa kesilapan ketika itu... gambar-gambar yang lain berada dalam kamera kawan sayaa... hhhahahaa... jumpa lagi.. =p

This is what I need now...

I read an article from Pastor Jaeson Ma, bout his mission trip from Jerusalem to Seoul Korea his passion towards Christ. He found out that many believers or Christians who have gone to church for their entire life but they dont know God.

From Jaeson Ma articles, he said I met a person the first night I came to Seoul Korea. This person is very well known, very accomplished, in the eyes of the public a strong believer, faithful to the family, serves in the church and owns a successful company. But this person contacted me to meet for an emergency… I felt led by God to meet with this person and when we met I found out the pain, emptiness and struggles in this person’s heart. This person was empty, on the outside everything seemed perfectly good, perfectly Christian, but on the inside this person was just going through the motions, living in duty and obligation for their entire life. Having faith, but no heart. Having religion, but no relationship. I looked this person straight into the eyes and said, “I don’t think your problem is how to get rid of this sin in your life, I think the deeper issue is that you don’t know God.”

From that it really touch my heart.. this is wat i'm struggling now, everyone said i've changed, i know that i've changed but.. do they know what my heart wants, branded goods, shopping, delicious food, luxuries stuff, money all cant make me happy until now, all these cant make me happy after all, all dis is my outside but my inside.. only God knows what i need and what i wants. God can feel my emptiness.

My passion in life is to know Him. My purpose in life is to know Jesus intimately. My desire when I wake up is to wake up to His beautiful face, His warm embrace and to taste the sweetness of His presence. My goal is to know You more Lord. I want to seek you, feel you, see you and love you with all my heart, soul and strength. Nothing in this life compares to the blessing of knowing You. There is nothing better in this life than to be in Your presence. To feel Your glory, to touch Your grace and to rest in Your arms. I love you Abba Father! I love You my Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. I adore You oh precious Holy Spirit … how I long to love you more this day, how I cherish every Word You speak to Me, I pray that every person I meet, every person I encounter would know You the way I know You, how I love to be LOVED by You… You alone are my desire. Jesus I need you like I need water to survive…

May this be our prayer this day…. I need Jesus… Come Lord Jesus come!

do u know that..

在我最需要你的时候你卻离开了我 =(

书香（稻香大学版）

Saya dapat lagu ini daripada email kawanku, lagu in daripada jay chou adalah sangat bermakna, taksangka, ada orang boleh tukar nia... erm.. penukar lyricsnya pun agak smart sampai lyricsnya sangat bermakna ... hahahaha

[ 书香（稻香大学版）][ 曲: 周杰伦 词: BirdtaN ][ 专辑: 魔杰座（个人特加版）]


※music※

对这个大学如果你有太多的压力
害怕了就不想继续读下去
为什么人要这么的脆弱懦弱
请你自己看看身边多少人
为学历在努力勇敢的读下去
我们是不是该努力
珍惜读书就算很大压力

还记得你说大学是你的梦想
随着书香课业继续奔跑
微微笑大学的压力我知道
不要哭让这首歌陪着你读书
把所有的压力全都忘掉
读书吧读到最后就美好

※music※ （好戏在后头）

不要这么容易就想放弃
就像我说的读不到的课程换个课
不就得了为自己的大学鲜艳上色
先把书涂上喜欢的颜色

笑一个吧..
大学毕业就是目的
帮自己加油加油这才叫做意义
大学毕业文凭终有一天飞到我手里 （哈哈）

所谓的那压力
面对读不完的书已读到怕了
业学术研究企划到绝望了
还有考试呢
我靠着家人在我背后支持我拼下去
哦哦..
家人朋友支持让我更努力
哦哦..
就算结果失败都不会放弃
珍惜读书就算很大压力

还记得你说大学是你的梦想
随着书香课业继续奔跑
微笑大学的压力我知道
要哭让这首歌陪着你读书
把所有的压力全都忘掉
读书吧
读到最后就美好

还记得你说大学是你的梦想
随着书香课业继续奔跑
微微笑大学的压力我知道
不要哭让这首歌的陪着你读书
把所有的压力全都忘掉
读书吧读到毕业就美好
※music※ （ 谢谢大家！）

孤单的旅行

歌曲：孤单旅行
歌手：何耀珊


当我睁开了眼睛却没看见你
我才想起难道你已经离去
当我走进了客厅
觉得太安静
我才感到真的一切变得好冷清

就算我努力试着面对
却还是不知如何相信这一切
从今后你不在我身边
谁给我勇气面对快乐和伤悲

真的要开始了自己
这场孤单的旅行
走在同样的生活里
过不一样的生命
该怎么开始我自己
这场孤单的旅行
你依然住在我心里
我依然想你

holiday baru start sudah kena...

hahaa...sebenarnya saya harus enjoy saya punya holiday... tak tau kenapa terlalu free sampai selalu kena shoot kat rumah, tidur pun shoot, tengok tv pun shoot... tak tau apa masalahnya.. kat rumah terlalu free kena shoot.. keluar yamcha dengan kawan, lepak dengan kawan juga kena shoot... apala ni.. adik keluar dengan kawan nya dan saya seorang kat rumah saya juga kena... apa masalahnya.. terlalu yong shui dah... haizz... apa boleh buat... muka saya telah lahir macam ni... tak boleh tukar dah... jika buatlahh plastic surgery bolehlahh... kamu ingat saya tak mau jadi cantik mehh... semua pompuan pun mau tukar imej sendiri menjadi cantik la.... boleh jadi seperti pompuan lain cantik sebagai berlian, cantik sebagai bunga... hahhaaa.... saya pun mau ada natural beauty sepert kawan saya... tak payah makeup pun dah cantik, rambut natural long, shine, soft, straight.. tak macam rambut saya macam singa... singa jantan... babi betul... lolzz

tau sangat geram betul tau... selalu keluar kena... tak dah keluaar kat rumah pun kena... saya memang tak paham apalah fikiran manusia.. memang susah mau difahami... macam in pun tak boleh macam tu pun tak bolehh...

Love ^^

1 John 4:7-10
Dear friends, let us continue to love one another, for love comes from God. Anyone who loves is born of God and knows God. But anyone who does not love does not know God - for God is Love.

John 13:14-15
Love each other. Just as I have loved you, you should love each other. Your love for one another will prove to the world that you are my disciples.

Love, what is the meaning of love, many people now a days mislead the meaning love. Some people, love is not a shopping product, love is more than that.. more than everything in your love. Everyone needs love .. if u are rich u cant buy Love... without love a person heart is emptiness, love does not only mean tat couple relationship love... that's lots of meaning in the word Love.. and there is lots of love... Eg, family love, friends love etc...but how does everyone sees the real meaning of love?

In our life there are three things that will endure - faith, hope and love - and the greatest of these is love ( 1 Corinthians 13:3)

1 Corinthians 13:4-7
Love is patient and kind. Love is not jealous or boastful or proud or rude. Love does not demand its own way. Love is not irritable, and keeps no record of when it has been wronged. It is never glad about injustice but rejoices whenever the truth wins out. love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful and endures through every circumstance.

我们须要学会了 ”爱“ 才能接受 ”爱情” 大半辈子带来的考验～ 不简单，不简单～ 你知道什么是爱吗？

SWT

i love u, u love me...
we are happy family,
with a great big hug and a kiss for u,
want to say u love me too....

hehhehhehheheheee...........
ki siaoo liaoo... hahaahahaa

1 day trip^^

Finally, our 1 day trip had success..!! hooray... =) we all united in 1 and do not separate into different group... Everyone of us had a very tiring day cozz everyone cycled under the hot sun and u noe wat we finish our destination. morning we went to eat dim sum, den depart to port klang, den night we went to stg sunway.. hahhaa... a very enjoyable 1 day trip.. pictures will be upload later... hahhaa

Our 1day trip is to pulau ketam, near port klang.. Evryone was busy cycling and one of our fren busy taking pics.. even everyone already hungry... she stil wanna take pics.. i think not i think every1 of us think that more than 1/2 of the pics that we took surely got her inside... hahaha... she summore still can say tired... theng... she nv cycle oso.. da whole day.. she kena shoot by every1... included inside da car and msn group chat..

our tai ka jie, the qian kam xiu jie juz know how to cook tong shui and do the house work, nt really know how to cycle, and every1 started kacau her and call her don become lui keong yan la, let ppl fetch la... bt den she still want and insisnt wanna cycle on her own... hahah.
and is our 1st time see her wear shorts pants... pheeweet... ^^

next, our superlady, drive her car damm fast and keep on 'tiong' on ppl's car ass... oso kena... hahah.. dey bully her said that.. u drive car keep on wanna tiong ppl's ass la uh, now see..we can tiong ur ass, cozz u dunno how 2 cycle... we tiong her bicycle ass.. hahaha.. kesiann betull

our house da pu jee.. aiyoo.. keng... can wake up so eaerly... did not complain wanna sleep... and so damm energetic.... till the nite..wonderful man pu jee... paling surprise 1 u all noe wat.. she go class the next morning le.. which is today... morning class summore... unbelieable... hahahaha

Evryine of us enjoy the one day trip, oni kesien duck and our bday boy coz dey need to fetch someone behind their back... they use most of their energy... and lastly we need to thank the drivers, really thank you san fu sai u all d laa.. anyway thanks yaa... ^^
We really cant wait for our next trip again... when will be our next one day trip le...??? hahhahaa ^^

The word klang makes me think of u, i noe u stayed dere.. when we enter the klang city, seriously i'm thinking of u... bt den when can i meet u again... ??
YTd we went sunsay pyramid and dere were having camera fair or something at the newwing.. i saw the promoter dere wearing nikon t-shirt juz same as wat u wear during the last day we met, when i saw that, the first thing come into my mind is u.. already 1 week we did not meet each other , i was hoping for the day to see u again.. bt do u miss me? do u think of me..?? this is really a big question mark to me...

my heart melts because of u

since that day i met u, i thought is just a normal feeling, maybe is the first time i met u, and u gave me a very good impression..

the next day... i felt that i'm already fall into you beat by beat... ur appearance to me make me start to write a new melody... fr tat day onwards i hope tat i would noe u deeper, hope to be closer with u. U meltz my heart....

That only 3 days both of us been together, but i started to notice u is already the second day.. i hope tat i would be closer 2 u on the next day, but sadly i cant go on tat day, so the time both of us together is shorter. on the last day, i felt happy, u always walk to my side, stand near my side, bt den all ur 'behkia' dere kacau, if nt i would be have more chance talking to u.. i noe i cant blame u, because u have a post and a responsibility in u, u need to do your part..

Time past, the day already end, u already forgotten tat day is the last day both of us be together.. bt i still remember your last word, your smile... i will be missing it..
i dunno when is the next chance both of us meet again... i really hope that we can meet each other asap.. i really miss u.. miss u....

21/8

After the 24 hours, erm... i know that i'm wrong...This is my sincere apologize bout my ytd blog... i not mean 2 hurt every1... bcozz ytd i too care bout the situation d..bcause tat roadshow is 1 of my very close friend road show... i scared hurt her feelings... so i too care bout it..i m 2 care wat dey said, and gt tersirat in.... i'm so sorry 2 everyone here...
I'm so sorry................

okiee.. now we don see things in this direction.. we use another angle to look at the problem... they really tell me the truth and all this are really their problem..,or mayb is hard 2 reject da job so use another reason so it is easier to reject it.. this is their choice and i cant force them to do, everyone have their human rights to choose their decisions.

now... actually is not a big problem, oni i'm the ONE too sensitive bout it.... i'm the one, who made the terrible mistakess... i'm so sorry..


SORRY!!!!!
SORRY!!!!!
SORRY!!!!!SORRY!!!!!
SORRY!!!!!SORRY!!!!!SORRY!!!!!SORRY!!!!!
SORRY!!!!!SORRY!!!!!SORRY!!!!!SORRY!!!!!
SORRY!!!!!SORRY!!!!!SORRY!!!!!SORRY!!!!!SORRY!!!!!
SORRY!!!!!SORRY!!!!!SORRY!!!!!SORRY!!!!!SORRY!!!!!SORRY!!!!!SORRY!!!!!
SORRY!!!!!SORRY!!!!!SORRY!!!!!SORRY!!!!!SORRY!!!!!SORRY!!!!!SORRY!!!!!SORRY!!!!!

20/8 shud be happie bt den

Finally.. i finished my 3 study paper...and today is my bro's bday... hahaa... bt den still not in da happy mood.

ok.. the problem now is started this way... one of my friend offer me a roadshow job in 1u, and called me help her find some part timer for tat job which is from 24-31 aug. Few of my friends agreed tat job which is ann, meichen, chloe, kaz, khimhon , henry and issac, den da results out analyse bt da management for those who get the job bt den ann and meichen could not get it.. i felt so sorry for them, and den later on issac said he cant work because and mum do some stuff.

Left 6 of them, bt den later on henry said he cant work coz his mum called him go bck 2 ipoh. Actually i'm ok wif it, although feel paiseh wanna tell my fren.. bt no choice ppl's parents called so i nid 2 tell my fren bout it.. den nvmm my frenz gt others part timer to work on ....

The next day, which is yesterday, khimhon sms-ed me tat he don wanna work d... because he gt no time 2 study.. hahhaa..bt den seihon everyday on9, fb, playgames, watch burning flame... gt time laa... thengg.... sampat toh sei... ahhahhaa..... den i told my fren bout da bad news again..

I dunno y i feel so sad bout it, den 2day khimhon told me tat actually henry don wanna work geh.. meaning tat he nt really go bck ipoh lo... i felt something like down... u all don wanna work ok fine...i hope tat u all did not lie to me... ermm....i noe i gt ntg 2 do wif it, but why u all wanna use something come and bluff me le, y u all cant tell me da truth le.. i noe i seldom hang out wif u all so many things i dunno wat's goin on, but i hope u all did not lie 2 me... i hope tat is i m da 1 with problems thinking too much... hahaa =(

After coll, i accompany jiki 2 see doc, coz bini's sis kena h1n1, prevention better than cure so jiki's bro called her 2 see the doc.. hahaa when reach da clinic, den i 'sun pin' see lo, coz i gt some slight cough and headache, den when i consult the doc, the doc said i have fever... haha... taksangka... after exam den kena fever... hahaa

exam time still can write blog.... hahhaaa

After finishing 2 paper.. 1 more study paper left. Tomorrow, marketing channel paper.. i seriously i hope tat i can get da results tat is beyond my expectation because dis sem gonna end soon, and i hope i can pull up my cgpa. On the other hand, i have not reach da expectation tat i ever wanted since i enter the my first year, in my uni life.

Eversince i cant enter to a government uni, i felt sad and disappointed always, but i still appreciate my life in the the private uni.

Since that day, my friend chiowhui told me about the end of the world, i felt quite ok and normal. because oneday it will happen soon, we just dunno when..??
But since last week i went bck 2 my hometown, during the study break and i planned to study well and achieve good results for my dis exam. But i saw Ann's FB she put her pm 2012 end of the world. When i read that, it really freaking down, and i was like totally shit. Serious?? just in 3 yrs time. den wat for i study...?? hahaha jk statement. Back Back Back!!! =) Ok . 3 yrs, wat should i do... dere is so much things that i not yet do... 3 yrs time is too short. Before that, some one told me 15 yrs, 15 yrs oso nt enough man, den later on some1 told me 5 yrs ,wow.. tat's stressing me in my life. Now 3 yrs....
Can all this dont happen so fast...

This 3 period of time i have a terrible nightmare and i cant sleep wwell.. i gt headache and dunno wat dreams la.... haizz.. In addition, the stupid H1N1 case... thengg... makes everyone cant sleep well and scared.... hope tat those scienctist will faster invent the medicine to cure this sickness and plzz don let it mutate summore.... that time... this world will become worst and worst...
.....i seriously no mood lo..........
Even until now, ytd when i was studying my IM but den no mood 2 study at all... seriously because of this end of the world thingy and some P&CO stuff laa... thengg........

This few months, my shopaholic mood started back again.. haahaa.... my parents ll kill me if i continue shopped like that.. my sis and my frenzz keep on stopping me from buying...
since end of the world is coming, wat for shop so much.. just to calm down and control myself frm buying... hahahha

Actually, i should be studying now, bt den dunno whr 2 express my painful feelings and so i start 2 express it in this blog... hahaa... although this is a brief explaination in my feeling... bt den due 2 my english language problem i dunno how 2 use those 'extremly boombastic' words 2 write and to express my real feelings whole heartedly.. hahaha...

走火入魔

(男)对不起刚才我是不是听错
还是我想太多想到了昏头
(女)天气不错开了窗吹走脸红
(男)进一步退一步都害怕打破
更不想在原地永远作朋友
(女)给你线索也给我勇敢借口
下定决心沉默
(男)就让沉默为我们追究
(女)你和我 (男)这一刻 (女)无声的 (男)耳语交流
(合)却突然震耳欲聋

(男)一字一句一瞬间走了火
(女)一天一点一转眼入了魔
(男)忘了我从什么时候
(女)忘了你为什么能够让我
(合)一步一步走火入魔-------
(女)和我

(男)一直猜一直想一直的揣摩
一直到你变成甜蜜的心痛
(女)如果可以把如果变成结果
下定决心执着
(男)就让执着为我们突破
(女)我和你 (男)的小说 (女)这时候 (男)出现烟火
(合)让情节充满感动
(男)一字一句一瞬间走了火
(女)一天一点一转眼入了魔
(男)如果你有相同感受
(女)感受到有种突然的冲动
(合)放肆一次走火入魔-------
(男)和我(nǚ) (女)和我
(合)和我(nán)
(男)如果你有相同感受
(女)感受到有种突然的冲动
(合)放肆一次走火入魔
和我

is freaking pissing me off

ok... i already trid 2 control myself bt den..... arrGGhhhhhh

sometimes when u wan ppl to treat you good, please look at yourself da way u treat others...
don alwayss think that you are the leader... don alWAyss show Your F***king face to others...
Can you be considerate...!! who are u actually...??juz a normal person like us, juz a normal human being living in this earth...

U juz wan wat u wan, n nv bother bout others feeling, can u think that if that person is you, what would u feel. or another person did da same things to you... It is totally pissing off..

U juz wan every1 to respect u as a leader in grp bt did u respect ottherss... u juzz wan wat u wan.. u wan every1 do things according to your way, you wan every1 to follow ur decisions, bt when did u follow the majority decisions.???

U juz wanna follow those who are rich and know how 2 dress up. U juz wanna noe those who are more social than others... bt den da way u wanna upgrade ur self n look down on others.... don u ever remember u are also the same as them...

Er.......... what a human world.. full off eviL....
got alot of thing i wanna express out.. bt den somethings are hard too explaInn......

Cant understand....

Now.. i dunno what happen..??
In front of me with a bunch of friend , she will treat me damm good, help me, say of my good things infront of my friends.

LAst time, everything she will tell me, no matter what happen, or she need help she wil tell me, but now.. there's lots of things she hide from me, many things she discover she will share with me, but now, she hide ffrom, she did not know that i've realise....

So many times, when i get news earlier from my friend, she will be angry. What is this?? I feel weird why must angry le.?? We 1 group of friend, we also goin out yamcha 2gether, juz oni my friend inform me 1st den call me pass msg ... like that oso angry..??? huh...??

Where I go..?? What I do..?? she always will ask..?? go with who...?? there is alot questions sumore.. I dont mind telling her... cozz.. i did not do anything wrong..?? bt den when i ask her, she will answer me with a very rude way. Sometimes when u nv say it, bt ur face shows, ur emotion shows it clearly...

Especially, when i go out with my friends, da group got 1 guy that she likes, when i go out with them she will be angry..huh..?? why le..?? i not goin out with that guy alone, i go with a group le.. haizz... She even ask me what are we talking about...?? I don mind telling her, bt den when i asked her bck da same questions, she will telling lies to me... I already knew bout it, y muz lie to me...

Lastly, I wanna noe, when can this test over... how m i goin 2 overcome this trial and tribulation.. Arrgghh... Seriously, i dunno what is she thinking about...? Can she think maturely...can she be more matured... She can lie to everyone surround her... bt den the person that she hurt, have observe what she has done...

I have alot of problems to face too... so many things i need to settle, so many circumtances i need to overcome.. it makes me so frustrated...

New Personn...??

ermmm... long time nv write blog d.. haha...

2009 May... haha... nearly half a year did not blog..

Now... who m i..?? i really dunno who m i..?? many ppl said i've changed... i change alot.... .

Did i change..?? which part..??